Street Smarts – Page 3 – Conflict Manager

Street Enforcement of Rules – Terry Trahan

It is a common misconception that, in a street or criminal subculture, there are no rules. Nothing could be further from the truth. Every successful culture and organization must have rules, both unspoken and implicit. Without them, it becomes a free for all, and the effects of this free for all would limit the ability of the cultures to operate and survive. Some of the effects these rules try to avoid are police involvement, collateral damage to civilians, harm to those in the group, and distracting power struggles both within and between differing groups.

The main difference between ‘regular’ cultural rules and the various street cultures is enforcement and understanding. Especially to some involved, there is not always a clear understanding of why certain rules exist. Because of this, there is usually some friction between established members and newer members of the group, until either an explanation is given, or more often, the rule is ignored, and an enforcement action is implemented.

One of the most sacred rules is to not screw over or cheat your own kind. Otherwise known as ‘don’t shit where you sleep’.

The reason for this is many. When you can’t trust the system, trust in your group is more important than usual. Also, it limits interpersonal conflict in the group, which takes time and resources from the important things the group is involved in. When this rule is broken, enforcement/punishment is handled within the group, and is fairly quick, and usually brutal in its execution. The usual is a beatdown or public humiliation of some sort. But, depending on the seriousness of the infraction, and the rank or position of the individual cheated, it can be creative, and much longer lasting.

An example. There was once a young man brought into a group, and allowed to stay with them in an apartment instead of on the street. This young man decided to rob the apartment renters jewelry to feed his drug habit. In these cultures, someone who provides shelter, food, mentorship, and care is pretty high on the list. This was a major violation of the groups rules, and demanded big punishment. The initial punishment administered was a series of beat downs, done randomly. Wherever he went, people, seemingly out of the blue would assault him. Not feloniously, to where police would get involved, but often enough that he never healed from the prior beating. But, this was only the beginning, as the rule he broke was a major one, it needed to be enforced, and an example made to show others why you do not violate this rule. Punishment was decided on, and parties were contacted to get the enforcement action in gear.

What was decided on was this. Since drugs were the driving factor in the “crime”, the major dealers in the downtown area agreed to cut him off. He could not get his fix in the downtown area any longer. For an addict without reliable transportation, this is a living nightmare. You must go further and further away from your base to acquire your drugs, which takes time and money. it also makes you go into ‘enemy’ territory,and deal with dealers who are not your contacts, that will not hesitate to jack you. This lasted until the young man moved on to another state, but his reputation will follow him, and he is marked in that particular circle.

It is important to point out that these cultures are not limited to a specific city or state, contacts exist and word spreads. And sometimes, punishment will be administered in a different city if the person runs, thinking distance will keep him safe.

There was a gutter punk at one time that was fairly respected, pulled his weight and contributed to his tribe, taking care of younger members and the like. Until his addiction took control. He became predatory among his own group, strong arming and bullying in order to up his supply. Another example of crapping in his nest. Unfortunately, he targeted an affiliate of the group, not a member, which is a fairly respected position, and usually off limits to this kind of thing. In the process of trying to strong arm this affiliate, he broke her arm. Knowing this was a major violation of all rules, and would bring a lot of heat, he chose to leave town, boarding a Greyhound bus.

Unfortunately for him, he was watched, and his destination was passed on to the interested parties. Calls were made, favors exchanged, and when the gutter punk in question stepped off the bus three states away, he was beaten and hospitalized as he was leaving the bus station. There was an above average viciousness to his punishment for two reasons, one was for who he injured, based on who she knew, and second, for leaving like a coward and not facing group justice. A message had to be sent that running would not protect you, and the arm of the group reached far.

Sometimes rules exist with multiple groups, to ensure the safety and protection of a wide range of people. Certain drugs and dealers are not allowed in an area, for example, in order to limit the damage. Bath Salts were one of these drugs, due to the danger they presented to users.

Enter a multiple rules violation situation, which shows how serious, widespread, and important these rules are across the different groups in a given area.
First rule, no Bath Salts in the downtown area, second rule, no sexual assault, third rule, don’t lie to your own, fourth rule, take care of your people. In the summer of 2014, one person violated all these rules, and brought punishment not just on himself, but on his entire group for his actions, as sometimes punishment is group instead of individually distributed due to the nature of the offense.

In a nutshell, a street level dealer got in a shipment of Bath Salts. He got high, decided to kidnap a street girl, rape her, forcibly get her high on the Salts repeatedly, and beat her. This street girl was with another man at the time. When he let her go, she was in a catatonic state, and has to this day not recovered her sanity, and nobody knows how many doses of Salts the dealer forced on her. This was one of the most heartbreaking things to have occurred on the streets of this particular city, as the girl was fairly popular, her man was working to get them off the street, and it looked as if they would escape the ‘life’.

So, needless to say, the reaction was swift and very violent. In one night, there were a series of felony and aggravated assaults along the corridor this group operated from. Not just beatings, I’m talking serious assaults doing grievous injury to the receivers. Anyone affiliated with this dealer was the target, as well as other dealers known to or bragged about having Salts for sale. Oddly enough, there was no interference from outside groups or even the police during this night. Rarely, various groups understand the need for looking the other way in order to accomplish a greater good. As long as the parameters of the hunt were obeyed, another example of rules enforcement, business could be taken care of.

It was understood that there were limited targets and time frame, and it was not a free for all. As far as the main target, he was located, taken to a different location, and nobody would comment further. This was one of the more extreme enforcement actions I have witnessed, but it shows multiple things. What some of the rules are, how people are valued in this culture, how much enforcement is left to these groups, and how cooperation can exist between even normal enemies to accomplish a goal.

Ok, now let us leave the street culture and go to another place that civilians think rules don’t apply to them at best, or don’t exist at worst… the topless bar! Yay, let’s go get drunk or high, oogle young women, let our inhibitions go, and nothing bad will happen, there will be no repercussions…

In a word, bullshit. The reason for bouncers and security staff are to enforce the rules of the establishment. As in the street and criminal subcultures, some of these rules are implicit and some are unspoken, but should be obvious to anyone with an above room temperature IQ.

A rule as simple as don’t go in the dancers locker room. Seems pretty obvious, but a surprising number of men thinks it applies to everyone but themselves, and this has caused me more fights than almost anything else in this setting. Another rule repeatedly violated is the do not touch the girls rule. Not only do most of the girls find you creepy and old, therefore not wanting you to touch them, it is actually illegal for the bar to allow this to go on. It can lead to prostitution and pandering charges, and ultimately close the bar down, and yet…

Now, most violations of these rules are handled by you being ejected from the establishment. If it was a bad violation, you may be 86’d permanently.
But there are some rules that will be enforced with an extra dose of violence when they are broken.

One of these rules is to not mess with the staff. Bartenders, wait staff and DJ’s are the lifeblood of a strip club. Dancers come and go, and sometimes come back, and are the face of the establishment, but the support staff makes the business run, keeps the party going, and brings in the money. Interfering with their ability to do their jobs, threatening them, or actually assaulting them are a good way of discovering pain and injury that you never would have thought of on your own. Another big no-no is to target vehicles in the bars parking lot for theft or breaking in. This leads to customers not feeling safe and welcome, which dries up the money flow. If you are caught doing this, there will be no quarter given, and you will learn that the bouncers know which angles and areas the security cameras do not cover…

Notice how most of the rules for a bar in general, and especially a topless bar are geared around money coming in. How serious would you be about enforcing your ability to make money and provide for your family. Now, imagine the ferocity a group of people will bring to that, it would not be a good thing to interfere with. In this world, it is all about protecting the resources. This is simple to understand, but is manifested in different ways. The established dealer in the bar will have a degree of protection from the staff, in order to keep a calm and quiet proceeding to the business being handled. Regulars will be afforded more respect and have more influence than off the street customers, as they are members of the ‘family’, and are part of the resource train.

Another thing that I found surprising was the number of ‘normal’ people that don’t understand the importance of manners and proper etiquette in underground cultures. These manners all exist to grease the interactions between various and opposing factions and people, too make things easier, and avoid needless conflict. Violation of these simple manners will be addressed very quickly in order to stop any unwanted attention and to keep worse violence from happening. Trust me, you don’t want to be the one that the example is made of as to why these rules exist.

If you must go to, or happen to find yourself in one of these areas, stay calm, don’t panic, and generally just stay quiet. Everyone there knows you are not a regular, or inhabitant of said culture, and will treat you accordingly. You may take some guff or verbal challenges, but in general, physical violence will only come if you really screw the pooch. The surest way to guarantee you will have enforcement brought to you is by insisting on the rules from your home or culture be dominant in your new surroundings. This is a particular form of arrogance brought mostly by young men, and oddly enough, middle class visitors to an area. For real, folks, don’t be that guy. Your safety is in your hands, and is very simple to affect, behave yourself, don’t be an ass, and be quick to apologize or explain if called on the carpet for making a mistake.

Eye Contact: Watch People-Read Body Language, Part III – Tristan Chermack

When you watch people, strangers or people you know, look at them for more than just recognizing who they are. Look for a moment longer and try to get a feel for their mood or current attitude. We are not talking about trying to read every person in a crowd. It is very helpful to see when someone is showing signs that they are upset, angry, hostile or aggressive. These signs start out fairly subtle, but are pretty plain to people who are even a little bit used to looking for them.

There are many books out there on reading body language and facial expressions, and you can certainly research much more on the subject. It is not necessary to become an expert on the subject to look at someone for a few seconds and get a feel for whether they might be in a foul mood. It is easier when you know them and are familiar with their normal state.

One particular trait to watch for is the person who is looking around to start trouble. Bullies show their predatory instincts by scanning around actively and studying people they consider might be good targets. This should be a warning flag to you. It is pretty obvious, and is pretty easy to spot – as long as you are looking!

A bully, or bullies, might have taken up a spot and are ‘on the hunt’ for a good target. The part to look for is when they spend more time scanning around outside their group than talking with each other. Picture in your head a group of lions sitting on a hill watching for a nice, tasty antelope to happen along. If you see this, then stay relaxed and calm but move along and get out of their sight quickly.

The goal of watching people and reading their body language is to get a feel for their mood and intentions. Your instincts will almost always warn you when someone is up to no good. In fact, we recommend not getting too caught up into researching tiny details of body language because they can distract you from using your instincts to get a good impression of someone’s mood.

You should practice every day, which is easy and even fun. Look at people you know and try to get predict what mood they are in. You will have to do this before you talk with them. Observe them for a few moments and guess their mood, then greet them and chat a bit to see if you were right. Once you talk with them, their mood should be pretty clear and you will find out how close you were.

If you try it with strangers, you won’t be able to confirm if you were right but it is still fun practice and you can do it almost anywhere. The more you play around with it, the better you will get. Before long you will be able to spot people who are: relaxed, happy, nervous, upset, or in any number of other moods.

When you have built up this skill, people who show signs of aggression and anger or have the intention of causing trouble will stick out like a sore thumb. Your instincts will tell you something is wrong. It is up to you to listen and heed those warnings.

Years ago when I worked one of my first security jobs, a seasoned pro showed me how well someone could hone these skills. We went from working the door in a bar to helping sort out getting a PA system set up. He never stopped scanning despite working on an unrelated task. He was particularly interested in those entering the room because he already sized up the patrons who were there. A man walked in and he quietly leaned over to me and said “Watch that guy. I guarantee by the end of the night we will be carting him out of here.” He didn’t look any different than any of the other patrons. He was dressed similarly, although he did walk in alone. He wasn’t scowling, or appeared to be carrying a weapon. I asked if the pro knew the guy from a previous encounter, but he hadn’t ever seen him ever before. There was something in his body language that told the pro that this guy was not here to enjoy a beer and some music. Sure enough, a few hours later we had to throw the guy out because he got aggressive.

I can still picture the guy’s body language, it was so subtle that it would not raise an eyebrow to most people. That old pro not only knew to look at every person coming into the bar but knew the body language to look for. Not even sure he could describe what it was either, he just knew it when he saw it and it gave us a heads up to take caution.

Eye contact and body language are huge factors in self-protection. You may wonder why I use the term self-protection instead of self-defense. Quite simply, they apply to two very different things. Self-defense describes the physical skills you use when in physical conflict. Self-protection describes the skills you use to avoid physical conflict. Self-defense is what you need to employ when your self-protection skills have all failed.

A great start to building self-protection skills are mastering eye contact and reading people. It’s pretty easy and fun to do.

Self-Defense And The Art Of Motorcycling – Randy LaHaie

Riding a motorcycle has been used as a metaphor for all kinds of things: philosophy, living in the moment, dealing with fear, freedom, independence and the list goes on. In this post I’ll list my top ten guidelines for safe motorcycling and draw the comparison to how those same principles can be applied to self-defense.

Whether you ride a motorcycle, used to ride, plan to ride or think that any one who rides is “bat shit crazy,” these pointers are intended to make you think. Principles are principles… Its how you apply them that determines whether they are useful to your particular situation and goals.

I’ve ridden motorcycles and studied self-defense all of my life. Over the years, I couldn’t help but notice that the concepts and strategies needed to anticipate and deal with interpersonal violence parallel those needed to avoid wipeouts and collisions.

Let’s see if you agree.

1. Adopt A Proactive Mindset

Motorcycling: Riding a motorcycle is a blast! That being said, if you’re going to ride, you need to acknowledge that motorcycling can also be a dangerous way to travel.

Riding a motorcycle is an enjoyable, exhilarating activity. But it’s not without risk. People who ride need to balance their desire to live life to the fullest with taking responsibility to deal wit threats and hazards along the way.

Self-Defense: The statistical probability of being mugged, robbed or the target of a violent crime is low. It’s easy to adopt an “it-will-never-happen-to-me attitude,” and go on about your life in a state of ignorance and complacency.

Self-Defense starts with the decision to accept full responsibility for your personal safety and to implement thinking and behaviors to allow you to do that. The key is to adopt safety-related “habits” that become second nature.

2. Master Your Technical Skills

Motorcycling: A proactive biker is always working on his or her riding skills. The operative skills of the bike should be practiced and improved deliberately and continuously. Braking, cornering, and collision avoidance don’t improve automatically just by collecting clicks on the odometer.

Don’t rely on that long-forgotten motorcycle safety course (if you took one) to teach you all you need to know to ride safe and respond to emergencies. You need to continue learning and practice to improve your riding skills.

Self-Defense: How proficient are your self-defense skills? Are they something that you practice on a regular basis, or are you relying on the fact that you “used to” take martial arts or self-defense classes?

Do you assume not only that you’ll know what to do in a volatile situation but also that your actions will be effective? How often do you practice your combative skills?

Skills and conditioning are NOT permanent. They erode unless you invest time and effort on an ongoing basis. If you’re serious about self-defense, training should be a part of your lifestyle.

4. Constantly Scan Your Environment

Motorcycling: Riding a motorcycle “connects” you to your environment. Straddling “a motor on two wheels,” and riding it at a high rate of speed, exposed to the elements, only inches off the pavement is a visceral experience. You’d BETTER be tapped into what you’re doing and what’s going on ahead, behind and beside you.

Obstacles on the road, potholes, patches of sand, gravel and ice are a constant. The chance of an animal, a pedestrian or another vehicle crossing your path is to be expected. You need to balance your enjoyment of the ride with a continuous assessment of your environment for potential hazards.

Self-Defense: In self-defense training the term “always be aware of your surroundings,” is so overused that it becomes a redundant cliché. As legitimate as that advice is, you will constantly catch yourself being distracted, pre-occupied and often oblivious to what’s going on around you.

I’m not suggesting that you adopt a state of fear and paranoia, but rather a calm and alert attitude and the cultivation of “awareness,” which I define as:

Knowing what to look for.
Disciplining yourself to actively scan and pay attention.
Matching the degree of your attentiveness to your current situation.

The quicker and more consistently you’re able spot a potential problem, the more options you have to deal with it and the more successful you are likely to be.
5. Dress For Success

Motorcycling: Ever seen some goofball on a sport bike riding in shorts, a muscle shirt and flip-flops? He was probably the one weaving in and out of traffic, showing off and going faster than he should be. Here’s a tip: Don’t be that guy!

A responsible biker is deliberate about what he or she wears while riding. A biker’s wardrobe is intended to protect her from a spill or collision and to shelter her from the elements (heat, cold, rain, sunburn, dehydration). She anticipates the inherent hazards of the road and dresses accordingly.

Self-Defense: What you wear in a self-defense context is also important in two ways: response capability and victim selection.

Does your clothing allow you enough traction and freedom of movement to fight or flee from a violent encounter? Dressed the way you are, can you move, kick, strike or run effectively even if the ground is slippery or uneven?

Does your clothing draw attention to you or make you stand out in a crowd? Could what you are wearing make you look out-of-place, wealthy or like a tourist? These types of signals can attract predators.

6. DON’T Mind Your Own Business

Motorcycling: Bikers have to accept the fact that they can be the most responsible, proficient and safety-conscious drivers on the road and STILL be at risk of a catastrophic event. It’s not all about you.

Roads, streets and highways are proliferated by tailgaters, impatient speeders, distracted drivers, drunks, reckless jerks and generally bad drivers. You’re going to have to take that into account.

You’ll have to be constantly on the lookout for “the other guy.” Watch for cues and patterns of careless behavior and do what you can to steer clear.

Self-Defense: You can go through life minding your own business, living a responsible and considerate existence and STILL end up on the receiving end of a predatory, threatening or violent situation.

At the risk of sounding dramatic, criminals, drunks, bullies and more recently, extremist nut jobs are out there. Learn to recognize the cues and behavior patterns associated with these characters and be prepared.

7. Expect The Expected

Motorcycling: A safe rider knows the most common hazards. For the most part, the most likely threats are predictable. If you know what they are and make an effort to look for them, you’ll be way ahead of the game.

An approaching vehicle turning in front of you, a motorist racing to beat the red light, travelling in the blind spot of a driver about to change lanes… these are some of the situations that happen on a regular basis. Watch for them.

If you do your homework, the potential threats are NOT endless. They can be boiled down to a handful of common, reoccurring events.

Self-Defense: There are also patterns and recognizable behaviors associated with criminal, predatory and violent incidents. Some of the obvious ones include: someone following or watching you from a distance, someone trying to distract you by asking for the time or for change while invading your personal space, someone looking around while approaching you… just to name a few.

Statistically, some things are much more likely to happen than others. Know what they are, watch for them and you’ll be able to predict behavior.

8. Steer Clear Of The Beer

Motorcycling: Many people envision motorcycling and guzzling “frosty fermented beverages,” to go hand-in-hand. I’m not about to get all preachy on this point. I enjoy a couple cocktails as much as the next guy. But you’ve got to be smart about it.

It’s a no brainer that having too much to drink and driving a motorcycle is a recipe for disaster… and yet people still do it. Too much booze in your system will impair your coordination, reduce your awareness, lower your inhibitions and mess up your decisions.

If you’re going to drink, save it until you park your bike for the night and fill your boots… preferably in the company of trusted friends and in a safe place.

Also keep in mind even if you don’t drink, OTHER people’s drinking can cause you all kinds of grief. Many bikers avoid riding at times when the bars are closing and there’s more likely to be drunks on the road.

Self-Defense: I don’t have to tell you how often booze is involved in volatile, aggressive and violent situations. If you’re the kind of person who likes to go out in public and get “polluted” on a regular basis, the chances of you becoming a victim increase dramatically.

When booze is involved, you need to be aware not only of your own consumption, but you also need to consider those around you who are drinking. Even if you don’t drink yourself, being around people who are pounding back the brewskies increases the odds of a confrontation.

To ignore the booze factor in your self-defense game plan is a big mistake.

9. Ego Kills!

Motorcycling: Far too often ego is a source of bad behavior and catastrophic errors in judgment. An “ego gone wild,” on a motorcycle can spell disaster: showing off, driving beyond your capabilities or the conditions, or “battling” with other drivers for space on the road are just a few examples.

If you’re going to ride, leave your ego in the garage. Be humble and use common sense. Wear your safety equipment, control your speed and drive responsibly. It’ll go a long way towards years of crash-free riding.

Self-Defense: In a self-defense context, ego is your enemy. Far too often, people are killed or seriously injured fighting over something that’s not worth fighting for. Feeling that you have something to prove, refusing to back down or acting like a tough guy can have dire consequences.

As a retired police officer, I can’t begin to tell you about all of the tragedy and heartache that I’ve seen as a result of someone’s misdirected sense of pride clouding their ability to make intelligent and mature decisions.

Regardless of how “combatively capable” you are, you’ll save yourself a ton of physical, emotional and legal headaches if you can set your ego aside and deescalate or disengage from a confrontation.

There’s an old saying in law enforcement, “Nobody ever wins a fight. The loser goes to the hospital, the winner goes to jail.”

10. Enjoy The Journey

Motorcycling: This is another one of those over-used clichés that people throw around in relation to just about everything. In the case of motorcycling however, it’s literally what you should do.

Travelling IN a vehicle, usually involves wanting to get to your intended destination as quickly and efficiently as possible. (“Are we there yet?”)

On a bike, the focus is NOT as much on getting there as it is about enjoying the ride. Bikers will take their time and go miles out of their way to enjoy a more scenic route, a historical site or a stretch of twisty roads.

More times than not, you’ll head towards one destination and end up changing course because of time, weather, circumstances or maybe just because you changed your mind and decided to go somewhere else. That’s just the way it works.

Self-Defense: This is a great analogy for your martial arts, combative fitness or self-defense training. Too many people rush to learn new skills, get in shape or earn that next belt. They risk burnout, injuries and a loss of interest by chasing quick fixes, short cuts and easy results. (which for the record, don’t exist)

Training is about enjoying the process and letting results come as a natural byproduct of repeated actions taken over and over again with seemingly little or no immediate benefit. Over time however, those “insignificant” actions add up to significant, life-altering results.

There is no “finish line,” where health and safety are concerned. Training should be seen as an ongoing, never-ending, life-long process. Enjoy the ride!

Conclusion:

So there you have it… my top ten riding tips and how they apply to self-defense. I hope this post got you thinking. If you have any questions, opinions or feedback, please feel free to fire me an email at Randy@ToughenUp.com or you can reach me through my blog at http://www.ToughenUpBlog.com .

Bio: Randy LaHaie has taught thousands of people over the course 40+ years as a self-defense, combative fitness and confrontation management instructor and consultant. He’s a retired policeman with experience as a patrol officer, detective, SWAT team member, shift supervisor and full time defensive tactics and use-of-force trainer. He’s a court declared expert witness and subject matter expert in various aspects of dealing with volatile, violent and dangerous situations. Randy shares his knowledge and opinions on the “Toughen Up Self-Defense Blog,” at www.ToughenUpBlog.com .

WeaselCraft, My Approach to Survival & Self Defense – Terry Trahan

Oftentimes during one of my seminars, or when I get a new student, the question arises, what is WeaselCraft, what does it mean, and why do you use it. Origination of the term comes from famed Firearms writer and instructor Massad Ayoob. He defined it as all the non-traditional things you do in a fight to survive. Back in the heyday of internet forums, I was part of the moderator team at SelfDefenseForums.com, and my Brother and fellow moderator Don Rearic made a comment about me in a thread that stuck, he called me a ‘street weasel of the first order.’ Because of this, the name stuck, and soon all of the things I taught or wrote became labelled as WeaselCraft. A friend did a couple drawings representing a street weasel, and thus it was born.

Now that we have the history, I will go into why I still use it, and what it means to me. I like the term, it is unique, and it really sets the boundaries and marks the differences between what I teach and believe from other approaches. In a way, for me, it harkens back to the animal styles of Chinese martial arts, but for me, the animals become Weasel, Rabbit, Honey Badger, Fox, and Crow.

Above all else, WeaselCraft is a mindset. A way of thinking that has only one goal, to get myself and my loved ones home, any way needed. There is no dogma or tradition, no rituals, just a set of concepts and loose rules that inform the way I operate and move through my environment.

As mentioned, the most important aspect of WeaselCraft is results, I want to get home, I don’t care how, as long as there is as minimal an impact on our lives as possible, and we are safe, from both the immediate threat and the aftermath. This outlook and goal orientation makes a lot of options available, as when you realize, for example, that machoism has no place in a survival incident, and there is no shame or ‘proper’ form in surviving, you can get straight to the point.

Skillsets become very important when you are applying anything to a survival situation. In my experience, software, or skillsets, become much more important than hardware, or all the neat little tools and toys on the market. With the proper skillset and outlook, tools can be applied as needed, or created on the spot, but the opposite is not true. As we have all heard, when all you have is a hammer, every problem becomes a nail, when you have a complete mental toolbox… I think you get the picture.

But, what skillsets are important?

Awareness and observation; these are listed first because without them, nothing else matters. If you cannot see the problem, or the escape route, you cannot do anything about the issue at hand. This applies to confrontation, violence, and emergency situations of all types. To be good at WeaselCraft, or personal survival in general, or life itself, spend more time working on these skills.

Mental flexibility; the ability to see outside the box, alternative uses for items, differences and how to use them to your advantage.

Adaptability; I wanted to say resilience, but adaptability hits closer to the core of my philosophy. The ability to bounce back, use what is given you, change what you have to what you need, and see how and what you need to see. These are key skills, and without them, nothing else works.

Toughness; the ability and attitude to keep going to achieve your goal. But not in the limited definition, it also means the toughness to make hard choices, forgo ego stroking or feel good decisions, to complete your mission.

Decision making; this is an oft overlooked aspect of skill development. In a live fire event, the quicker you can decide, the better choices and more time you have to affect your plan.

Related to these, and falling more into the physical realm, WeaselCraft looks at physical skills that we deem more important than the fighting aspect. Things such as trauma care, escape and evasion, conflict communications, anti-abduction skills, active people watching and awareness, and other “black bag” type skills.

All the above skills are important to us, as it is better to avoid than confront, better to confront than fight, and better to fight than die. Avoidance skills need constant practice, and take up a large portion of our mental workout, and individual training.

Physically, our skillset is primarily taken from the SouthEast Asian martial arts, particularly Silat and Kali. However, the way we apply them is much more combative in nature than you normally find them. We take the principles and motion base from our arts, and apply them to modern situations.

We place great emphasis on maintaining a low profile, non-tactical appearance. I would say we follow the Grey Man theory, but now I see that has been made into a commercial venture, so we just try to look as normal as we can, considering we are very tool oriented.

Finally, a large portion of our training time is devoted to weapons, both use of, and defense against. The reason is simple, we are more likely to be attacked or threatened with a weapon, so we need to know how to deal with them, and with our first rule and goal being to go home, weapons are the equalizer, especially against larger, or multiple opponents. The weapons we concentrate on are small knife, various impact/stick weapons, pocket stick and variants, and a few flexible weapon skills.

None of us live in a vacuum, and we try to apply all of these skillsets and hardware to the modern legal context, as long as it supports our goal of being safe, and going home.

As I sit here listening to Mississippi Queen, at home, I hope you take my approach, think about it, and let it inform your own way of getting home.

Eye Contact: Observe Surroundings, Part II – Tristan Chermack

Observe surroundings

Any self-protection must involve you paying attention to your surroundings, regardless of whether there are people around. Keeping an eye on people adds a little more difficulty to the task, but it is still pretty easy to do. Let’s look at each of these separately.

When observing your surroundings, you should first be looking for anything that might pose a danger. Accidents claim more victims than predators, and self-protection skills also work with accidents. Many accidents happen because of a lack of awareness. The street crossing analogy comes into play here: look to see if you can safely cross the street regardless of what the light says. Potential threats come in many shapes and sizes, so we cannot possible tell you every way to spot them here. Keeping your eyes open for potential problems, or accidents waiting to happen, is something you must build. The practice of looking around rather than having your eyes buried in a cell phone or iPod works splendidly.

It should take a quick look around, for only a second or two, to get a decent feel for your surroundings. Familiar surroundings are easier, but you should take the time and effort to notice anyway. If a place is familiar to you, looking around can show you something that is out of place or not normal. This can be helpful to give you a heads-up that something might be amiss. Your instincts will pick up on these things, you only need to scan around and take in what you see.

If you are in an unfamiliar place or somewhere that gives you an uneasy feeling, you will probably look around a lot before becoming assured that you will be safe. This is an instinctual trait so use it. Once you have looked around extensively and still feel uneasy about where you are, you should really leave. If you cannot leave, get yourself to a position where you can see anything approaching you. This brings us to the next point about observing surroundings.

When you observe a room, you should be doing more than looking for threats. You should look for where the exits to your immediate area are. If you had to get out fast, which ways could you go? These exits are also entrances. We will discuss observing your surroundings for people next, but you should know where they come in so you can see who comes into your area. Knowing where the exits are is a good habit to build.

Another thing to watch for with your surroundings is where you are in them. Are you in a place where you can be approached by someone without noticing they are coming? In the best case, you should be somewhere that you easily notice people approach you. It is also best that you are in a place that has an exit handy from any given direction. The last thing you want is to be cornered by a threatening person, with nowhere to go to escape.

One last thing to look for in your surroundings is obstacles. They can provide a place for you that make approach difficult. It may happen that you notice a bully or group of potential bullies coming and want to stay out of their path. Rather than running for an exit, you can position yourself near obstacles to make it difficult to get to you. The great benefit of this approach is that you can usually move there casually without drawing attention. It will be easy to notice if the people you are concerned about are approaching you, and then you can move to an exit if it appears they are coming for you.

If you have ever been in the same room with a bully, you may have experienced looking at your environment in these ways. It is best to have an idea of what is around you before that panic hits and you are desperately looking for where to exit. We believe in preparing early, and this is a perfect example. It takes only a second to notice exits, so take a look. You might not need it, but if you do it is great to know already.

Now that we’ve covered the environment itself, the really important part is to watch people. You should at very least look for a moment at every person in your immediate area. If the area is very crowded, you should scan the crowd for anything that appears out of the ordinary. When you do your scan, let your instincts talk to you. They will tell you if you should be concerned.

This kind of looking around and scanning is more than glancing up from time to time. If you are sitting hunched over a book or cell phone and glance up momentarily and down, then you are missing two points: posture and observation. These two should work together.

Keep good body posture whether you are standing or sitting and scan regularly. Take your time scanning and don’t rush it. Anyone looking at you will quickly be able to tell which is more important to you: looking around or not paying attention to surroundings. It is okay to be absorbed in a book or texting with someone, but go to a place where you are safe to do so and look up and around frequently.

It is very common to watch for people when you know they might be present, and it is almost always someone you already know to be a potential threat. Kids who are around bullies learn to watch for their bully through pure fear. They are constantly scanning so they can see them coming and get out early.

One thing to add here, which is something more common to adults than children, is that purposefully not making eye contact is also a signal. Take care not to think that this is imperceptible because it is. If a potential predator looks at you and you are intentionally avoiding eye contact, he will very likely be able to tell. This is a signal of pure fear, which is not the signal you want to send. A confident person does not fear making eye contact.

Once you make eye contact, what you are thinking is pretty easily conveyed through your facial expressions. I’m not talking mind reading here, but simple mood and attitude. What is on your mind will affect the signals you are sending, so take care of what is on your mind. Be smart, not oblivious – confident, not fearful. This type of communication is fascinating, but not within the scope of this article.

What we take in about our surroundings and the people within it is crucial to avoiding trouble. You can think of it this way: your goal is to see trouble before it sees you. A predator decides when and where he will strike, which is powerful. Predators will avoid targets which are aware (hard to approach undetected) and do not look like good opportunities. They will dismiss inviting targets which are not in a good place or time to strike. The first indicator is eye contact or lack thereof. An unobservant target is very inviting. You might never even make direct eye contact with a predator. He may very well dismiss you as a potential target merely because he sees you scanning the area, staying aware, and appearing ready. It is so much better to avoid being targeted early than try to evade a predator who has already chosen you as a target.

Eye Contact: Your First Signal and More, Part I – Tristan Chermack

Making eye contact is something we do many times each day, and we may not even realize it but we all use it to communicate, consciously or not. Eye contact is a subset of body language and this article is meant to be an introduction to this language and how it works, with a particular focus on how it pertains to the art of self-protection.

There are excerpts here from my book “What the Bully Doesn’t Want You to Know – A Streetwise Guide to Your Bully Problem”. The book itself is focused on bully problems which children face and is written for kids and their parents. Neither the book nor this article are designed to be comprehensive works on body language, but a beginning. The reason for this article is that virtually all of what is written on body language is extremely broad and most of the material is not pertinent to self-protection or potential conflict situations.

I will expand on the material from the book to include information about adult interactions. The fundamentals are the same as they are for children and have added nuances for adults.

Let’s start with some basics. What we are talking about here is only the first few moments of eye contact. Virtually all adults realize there is far more to extended eye contact and the cues which can be learned from watching someone. Our instincts can indicate whether someone might be lying, in a bad mood, nervous, troubled, or any of a vast number of things. Let’s begin with the first impression we create when we make eye contact.

Eye contact

The importance of eye contact is hard to overstate. It is almost always the first contact we have with someone else. The eyes really are the window to your soul. The way you look at people, or don’t, tells them something about you.

Quickly lowering your eyes when you make eye contact with someone is a basic animal signal of submission and fear. This signal indicates to that person that you are weak, or at least that you think you are weaker than them. Animals reflect their ‘pecking order’ by showing signs of submission to those higher on the order than themselves. Lowering the head, and eyes, is a prime signal of submission. It is usually an unconscious response, but with a little practice you can learn to send a signal of confidence to those around you.

First, let’s define what you should and should not do. We have already indicated that quickly lowering your eyes and head down and away from someone is submissive. So, don’t do that. Almost everyone has done this, and it is a very common habit. So what should you do? If you find you have locked eyes with someone who you feel is threatening (or just about anyone else for that matter) it is a good idea to hold their gaze for a second. And we do mean a second literally, as in one-one thousand. Holding a gaze, or staring, for several seconds or longer can be construed as a challenge. It is possible to gather a lot of information about someone in one second. Once you have held their gaze for a second, move your eyes away calmly in a HORIZONTAL direction. This sends the message to someone that you see them, and you are unafraid. In others words, you are not being submissive.

Practicing this is actually rather easy. Simply go out and do it. Here is how:

Try it a few times in the mirror. You don’t have to go overboard here; just try to get the hang of what a confident gaze looks like for you.

Start with your friends to get the hang of it. By the way, they don’t even have to know you are doing it. You might be surprised at how they react.

Next, move on to strangers or anyone else who makes you uncomfortable. This should be a little difficult at first. You want to get used to feeling uncomfortable so that it ceases to be uncomfortable at all anymore. This can be done just about anywhere. A good place to practice is in a car where people are naturally reticent about looking at the person next to them.

Continue practicing this until you have made a habit of it.

You are on the way to controlling the message you send with your eyes.

If there was one thing you should recognize when it comes to reading someone else’s eyes, it is what is called the ‘hard stare’. The hard stare is a determined look that someone is mentally prepared for a fight. It is a reflection of what has gone on in their mind, locking out distractions and trivialities, focusing purely on the task at hand which is intently watching the target.

The hard stare is easy to recognize and will probably flip a subconscious mental trigger in you that something is wrong. The stare itself is identified by the eyes being open slightly wider than usual and lack of blinking. The eyes will lock on the target and not stray. The facial muscles and chin will tighten with a stony expression, which looks more like pure determination than anger. Once you see a hard stare you will recognize it instantly. It means the decision has been made and the eyes are issuing the challenge. This is a clear sign saying “I am ready to fight you right now.” You should treat this signal as what it is: a very clear signal of imminent threat.

Along with the stare, usually the aggressive party will usually stand up or already be standing. You’ll notice the body will go into a fairly prepared stance with the knees bent and the chest will face the target. Again, this is how the brain subconsciously prepares for battle. The time for sweet talking is over and you should either calmly depart or prepare quickly for a fight. This means get near an exit, with as many friends as possible, and among cover to keep from being surrounded.

Those first moments of eye contact will leave an impression, we cannot help that. What we can do is make sure we are sending the right message, not one which looks inviting to a potential predator. We wish to send the message that we are not prey by not using the same body language that prey uses.

You could call this the external benefit of eye contact: how others see you from the outside. Next we will cover the internal aspect, which is the benefit you receive when you learn to use your eyes well.

m time to time. If you are sitting hunched over a book or cell phone and glance up momentarily and down, then you are missing two points: posture and observation. These two should work together.

The Self Defense Continuum, Part IV – Teja Van Wicklen

Normal vs. Abnormal Behavior

The next step is to be able to identify types of behavior to avoid. To do this, we first have to recognize the things we already know, but don’t know we know. That is, we need to recognize Normal Behavior. For the sake of self defense Normal means not harmful or potentially dangerous. Spastic dancing or other attention getting behavior is quite normal in New York City where I grew up. You know what normal behavior looks like for a time and place, you just may or may not be able to articulate it. You may get an odd feeling when something isn’t normal, and that’s a start, but while you’re pausing to assess that feeling and whether or not to act on it, he’s getting into position.

Since it’s impossible to articulate all abnormal behavior, let’s clarify what normal behavior looks and feels like, so that when you see something that isn’t it, you recognize why. Pick a place and ask yourself what is normal behavior for that place. Imagine you are at your child’s soccer meet. What is normal behavior for a soccer field? Envision it. What is happening? Are planes landing? People on soccer fields mostly play soccer and spectate. A bunch of people may be using their phones to take pictures or tell family members who couldn’t make it what is going on. The kids who aren’t playing will be running or climbing on the bleachers.

What would be odd in this environment? What would bring your hackles up? What would look out of place? Would a lone older man standing separate from the crowd but intently watching the kids cause you to look closer? He might be a grandparent. Would a guy loitering around the parking lot just outside the field looking nervous and chain smoking make you watch more carefully?

It is very important that we not judge people but rather tune into our awareness. There is a fine line. Observe and take action if necessary, do not react to first impressions. All we are doing is taking something that normally hangs out at a low level of consciousness and moving it up for a moment into the spotlight so we can give it a name.

This simple thought process can work in many situations. Once you know the difference between, “normal” and “abnormal” you can also begin to articulate the difference between flirting and probing or asking and manipulating or between your boss calling you out for a reasonable short coming and his stepping over the bounds to something more personal or devious like coercion.

The 15 Foot Rule

Especially if you are in a Fringe Area or vulnerable position, you need to keep your distance from anyone even vaguely suspicious. Distance is your best friend. Do you want the lion next you or on the other side of the river?

Marc MacYoung recommends not letting him get within 5 feet of you. For man-on-man violence with slightly different cues and intentions that may be sufficient. I highly recommend women use the 15 feet rule.

According to law enforcement statistics, a criminal can close 20 feet in a second and a half on average at top speed. 15 feet gives you approximately one second if he lunges, but a second is a long time if you are already aware there might be danger. It is not enough time if you are clueless, but it is difficult to speak to someone further away, so 15 feet seems like the most reasonable distance to work with and reasonable is often the best we can hope for.

In practice here is what it would look like: A man employs the Positioning strategy known as Closing. He walks toward you, appearing to be in a rush, pointing at his watch. He says or implies, “It’s broken, do you have the time?” You are a woman alone in an underground parking facility (Fringe Area) and this makes you uncomfortable, though you aren’t sure why, other than the fact that you are a woman alone in an underground parking facility, which is enough. You have also caught the “it’s broken” and registered it as possibly a bit too much pre-thought information for the moment; too much information can mean lying and you have made a note of it. You employ the Progressive Fence by putting your hands up to show discomfort (Visual Fence). You have set a boundary. You can say, “Stop, talk to me from there,” (Verbal Fence)

Now, he might pretend he doesn’t speak the language, although you know that everyone reads distress language and stop signals pretty much the same way. He might pretend not to notice. How will he do this? Any way that will work! He might pretend he’s looking at his phone and doesn’t see you. He might pretend he needs help and that gives him the right to disregard your hands. You are aware that he is continuing to close distance. In some cases, a potential criminal might look past you as if planning to walk by, yet you can tell he’s focused on you even though he’s not looking at you. Maybe it’s because you look exceptional this morning, maybe not. Is he just one of those people acutely unaware of personal space? Do you want to stick around to find out?

This is what fifteen feet can do for you. It gives you time to calculate.

Whatever this particular potential criminal does, you now have several cues to work with. Cue number one, you’re in a fringe area and anyone who understands the most elementary thing about human interaction understands that you don’t stroll up to woman in a deserted area under any circumstances. Cue number two, he ignores your body language and boundaries. Cue number three, he ignores your words. This alone labels him as a predator unless he is completely clueless, drunk, desperate or otherwise impaired. Either way, no need to stick around. If he is really in need of help he can tell you from a distance. If he is so desperate that he needs to get that close, remember that a drowning person will drown you as well.

In the unlikely instance that you are confronted by a master criminal pretending to be old, infirm or blind, you will just need to use all we have discussed and be a good interpreter of human behavior. What if he breaks into a run and comes at you from fifteen feet or less. It comes down to your awareness, knowledge of exits, and your reaction time. There are lots of ugly possibilities. Luckily most of them are very rare. He will probably walk right by as if you weren’t there. Most people are not after you. If he is a predator, your awareness alone might informed him that you aren’t his girl.

In general if someone ignores your boundaries, get out. Get in your car, lock the door and drive. What you don’t want to do is stand there thinking to yourself that you’re probably just exaggerating or you don’t want to be impolite. Denial is common in unfamiliar situations. The remedy for denial is to heed your instincts and cues.

Let’s for a moment assume you are imagining things. Let’s assume that the guy walking toward you in the dim and deserted garage just doesn’t notice you. He also won’t notice you’re not there.

Fear of social embarrassment is a survival instinct. Not that long ago if you weren’t part of a hunter/gatherer group, you wouldn’t last long. If your group ostracized you, you starved, died of illness or were eaten by wild animals. So fear of public speaking goes back a ways. No one wants to act crazy or be labeled crazy, but there are times to disregard or override this fear. Remember the person walking toward you is someone you don’t know and are unlikely to ever see again. Do you really care if he goes home and tells his wife this crazy lady ran from him in the parking lot for no reason. She may even be likely to ask him if he got too close to you and enlighten him. And you’ll never know. Give yourself permission to act stupid if this sort of thing ever happens. Seriously. Do it. Say it out loud, “I am allowed to run away, slam my door or whatever I feel is necessary, if I feel in the least bit threatened. It doesn’t matter what I look like when I do it. I am not that person, this action does not define me. I am only doing the right thing at that moment by heeding my instincts and my training.” If it helps, pretend you’re late for something.

This may seem like a lot to remember – only you already know it. Just practice articulating behavior, context and intuition silently in your head and you will begin to create a consciousness around it. Once you create that consciousness, it will be relatively easy to pick out the cues of Intent, Interview and Positioning.

Non-Violent Disruption

Now that you know what Positioning looks like and how to articulate it, how do you Disrupt him before he gets into Position?

Obviously in real life rather than a classroom violence can get you into trouble even if you are in the right. It’s only your opinion after all. If you are female against a male you have a better chance of convincing people you were the one in danger, but let’s agree that if you can get away without leaving your fingerprints on the murder weapon it is preferable.

At the Positioning stage, talking is unlikely to help. He has already Interviewed you and determined you have what he wants. Some people recommend vomiting or acting crazy, but I have yet to meet anyone who can vomit on command and crazy people are attacked and raped all the time. In face, mentally ill and handicapped people are groups at high risk of abuse. If you have complete conviction, there may be situations in which you can Disrupt by bluffing. You might look over the criminals shoulder, yell police, or say something about that being the third unmarked car in that last few minutes. It is possible that some version of this might do the trick, but you had better be an excellent actor even under duress. If it works, he was probably either still interviewing you or he wasn’t highly motivated.

Running

Let’s discuss the art of the quick getaway. Once you realize you are in danger, you want to act quickly. One of the best strategies is to get out of the situation. Move. Make like a tree and leave. It’s pretty hard to get into trouble if you’re not there. If your chosen strategy is running, practice it. I don’t mean train for the Olympics or run a marathon, I mean practice sprinting. See how quickly you can take off. Practice against someone else, preferably someone bigger than you are, with bigger muscles and longer legs. Running away is a completely legitimate and honorable self defense technique! But you need to know how good you are. Running may not be your thing. If it isn’t, don’t count on it working for you in a pinch. Adrenaline doesn’t always make you super fast or super strong, sometimes it makes your legs weak and wobbly.

Noise

Screaming can get attention if you are in an area where screaming gets attention. There are places where people ignore car alarms, cities usually. If you are at a ballgame no one may notice. A good blood-curdling scream might create an opening for escape by jarring your assailant. But you must have an escape plan since screaming alone won’t necessarily cause him to end his plan to harm you, it might even cause him to harm you faster.

Another option is a sort of bark that off-balances him – a big loud guttural sound. You want to engage his flinch response. While he is recovering from the jamming of his signals, you should be running away, closing and locking the door, jumping out the window, whatever. This is more easily accomplished by men with deeper voices. I myself have not garnered anything but a kind of stare, whereas Rory Miller once demonstrated his barbaric yalp, which had the desired effect on my flinch response.

If you have a whistle use that, but if I were reaching into my bag for something and I thought I was in danger, it wouldn’t be a whistle.

All bets are off in practice. I wouldn’t count on a strategy like making noise if I had other options. Certainly use noise in addition to other things. But we are talking about non-violent options that might save us from having to fight our way out of a life-threatening situation and there aren’t many of them. If you don’t have an escape plan, all of this noise is of course contingent on whether or not there is anyone helpful around you to hear it.

Next, we Disengage the Attack….

Lies People Tell You About Violence – Clint Overland

When it comes to violence, you will hear a lot of lies. These lies come from martial artists, self-defense experts, the police, the media, the WWE, Hollywood, politicians, anti-violence activists, and more.

Here are just a few of them.

1. Violence never solved anything.

2. Only stupid or uneducated people resort to violence.

3. That there actually exists a fighting system in which you can’t be beat.

4. That bullets don’t punch through car doors or through house walls.

5. That you can hit someone repeatedly and not break your hand.

6. That when you shoot someone they automaticity drop dead
or get blown off their feet.

7. That beer bottles shatter when you hit someone over the head, but his head doesn’t.

8. That cars blow up when you shoot them.

9. That violence is random and senseless.

10. That you have to be loud and belligerent to make yourself threatening.

11. That Boxing and MMA don’t teach you anything about violence.

12. That professional fighting is the same thing as professional violence.

Fishing for Witnesses, Part II – Clint Overland

Ok so last month I told you about a situation that occurred and how I used the witness pool to help prevent me from going to jail. The plan was to write another article over the how and why of the matter to hopefully help you understand the science behind what you do to add this to your toolbox of violence. This is the fourth fucking rewrite and I am about ready to take this fucking keyboard out and blow this motherfucker up. SO fuck it this is what I got I am not a fucking scientist and I damn sure not college educated. What I am is a beat up old bouncer that survived 27 years in a business that eat souls and shits dreams.

What I also am is the most dirty and underhanded fucker to lace up a pair if steel toes. I will lie to drunks, use any information I can gather and basically play as dirty as I can to win, and by winning I mean I go home at night and hopefully no one dies. I left the business a little under a year ago for some health reasons and got talked into writing about this fucked up subject of self-defense.

Fuck it I went to the gym tonight banged out a set of widow-maker squats, came home drank some really good bourbon, sat down and here we go. Sit down shut up and hold the fuck on. We are going to talk reality in the US. I don’t know the laws where you live but I can tell you from talking to others in the business, things are as fucked up wherever you live as they are here. Used to you could swap skin, bust your knuckles on another guys head and no one called the law and no one got sued. Today with the pussification of mankind everyone wants to be a bad-ass but no one wants to shit teeth or spit blood. No they want to call the cops and twist everything up in court.

Here are two statements that can be made after an incident see if you can tell which of the two will get you taken straight to jail and which one will show reasonable doubt and show self-defense to the police.

Statement 1 “You’re goddamn right I kicked that pussies ass, I fucked his shit up! Told that mother fucker not to try his shit here or I was going to stomp his ass!”

Statement 2 “No officer I asked him to stop, I tried to walk away and he just kept coming at me trying to harm me. I didn’t want to hurt him but he wouldn’t stop. Is he ok? I just wanted to make him stop trying to hurt me.

If you picked statement 1 as your go to answer please do us all a favor and put a blindfold on then play catch in traffic. You are an idiot and should never get the chance to breed more of your stupidity into others.

If you picked statement 2 then we can work with that. You are the person I want to help with their fishing in the witness pool. Statement 1 is the one that will cost you a fortune in lawyer fees and possibly get your ass shanked in prison. Statement 2 give you the one thing that you are looking for when dealing with the police and with witnesses. Your narrative must make the individual feel sympathy for you.

If you read last month’s article you might remember that I said I went back to the people that followed the situation out to the parking lot. I also explained that I told them about the situation and how that this wasn’t the typical type of situation at the establishment. What I didn’t do was go into detail about what I said. Here is goes, imagine yourself as a witness to the occurence.

Guys I am so sorry that you saw that! This isn’t what goes on here, I tried to get him to just calm down and enjoy the night. I think he was going outside to use meth or something and he just wouldn’t stop acting up. I really am sorry you had to see this. Let me buy you a drink to apologize for you having to see this. Wow! Please we don’t normally have that kind of thing go on here. I can’t believe that he tried to head-butt the waitress and then tried to hit the manager and
me. I can’t believe that he acted that way! Here let me get the door for you. Y’all have a nice night and I will get you both that drink.”

Ok so what is your opinion now that the guy you saw use violence came up to you and apologized for you having to see it. Sympathy, if so good that is what I want you to feel. I want your sympathy. I want you to think Hey that isn’t a bad guy at all, he is just doing a hard job and that ass-hole he threw out deserved it. When you are fishing the witness pool this is exactly what you want to do. Notice how many time I apologized, how many times I reinforced my position to them that I
didn’t want to do this but his actions lead to the situation. Did you notice that I bought them a drink as a way of apology for them experiencing this. These are the type of thing that you need to think
about. How can I make my narrative more sympathetic to the ones that saw it. How can I make them see me as the good guy.

Funny thing about people is the way that they interpert what they see. Ask an experienced police detective how many people he or she has to interview to get a clear picture of what goes on, and also ask them why they separate the witnesses. What you are doing by talking to the person and making your case sympathetic, is explaining what they saw and why you were forced to do this. You must make yourself into the good guy. You must be able to articulate to the person in such a way as to make them want to help you out.

Come back next month for this ongoing clusterfuck of an article. Really should have tried to put this mother fucker in book form because there are a thousand things I want get across to you

Do me a favor guys I am looking for feedback good, bad or ugly about how I am doing. Like I said I am not a professional writer and this is all new for me.

Contact me at coverland1969@gmail.com and let me know what you think

Peace

The Self Defense Continuum Part III – Teja Van Wicklen

Disrupt His Position

“Never let the enemy pick the battle site.” ~ General Patton

In past issues of The Conflict Manager we covered the beginning concepts of The Self Defense Continuum. We discussed what it is to Decide to Spot Criminal Intent and how to Deter at the Interview Stage. The next phase of the Continuum is the Positioning Stage which is a particularly volatile point in a criminal transaction. Every step we take in the Continuum removes opportunities for us to detect criminal intent and extract ourselves from the situation.

In the Positioning Stage a criminal puts himself and/or you in place for a successful attack. I should say criminal or criminals, because, remember these guys sometimes work together. The idea that there is safety in numbers goes both ways.

To take a step back, the Interview can take place over the phone, by watching only or up close and personal. An Interview which takes place face-to-face or even in the same room may put a shady character in Position already, unless the room happens to be a police station or is in some other way unsuitable. A criminal with Intent who is in already in Position after a successful Interview will Attack unless something pretty significant changes that makes it unsafe for him to attack you. Because of this, somewhere between the Interview and Positioning Stages, will be the last available moment that allows you the space to avoid violence rather than extract yourself from it. Avoidance is to walk away, extrication is to have to exert more energy and undertake more risk. Positioning is the dividing point between Before and During on the Self Defense Continuum. This is why we need to carefully choose who we get into the car with and what the circumstances are. It may be the last choice we make in the Positioning stage. The next stage is quite a bit messier.

We are specifically discussing physical attacks, but this information translates to other types of crime as well. Online the Positioning stage might involve a predator asking progressively more personal questions or sharing something that makes you in turn more open to sharing. He is working you into a Position in which he can successfully ask you to share something extremely personal or even for a live meeting. Again, he or they will use whatever works. Marc MacYoung, who created the 5 Stages, says that a predator, doesn’t usually want to fight, he wants to confuse and overwhelm his victim. This goes for both online and in person situations. A criminal doesn’t want you to have the opportunity to fight back (or shut down communications) at all. He wants to overwhelm you with charm, force or whatever works best for his purposes, leaving you no time or inclination to reason.

A discussion of predatory positioning would not be complete without a mention of Fringe Areas. I am not implying that Fringe Areas are the only places Positioning happens but they do constitute a large portion of the places violence occurs.

A Fringe area is a place on the periphery or on the way to and from somewhere else, hallways, stairways, shortcuts, elevators, alleys, parking lots, garages, etc. Anyplace something can happen and no one can hear you or get to you in time is a Fringe Area. Home can be a fringe area for victims of Domestic Violence or during a home invasion. The inside of a house is secluded and private, the way we like it when we shower and sleep. Criminals like privacy too.

Fringe Areas can also be temporary or transient. An office building might only be on the fringe after hours. A bathroom at a club is a common Fringe Area when the music is too loud or everyone too stoned to hear you or do anything. The back of a bus is on the Fringe if everyone is up front or the driver is distracted by a car accident. The closed room of a house during a party is another common Fringe Area.

Criminals are intimately familiar with these places and we are not. They are like fish looking up at bugs on the surface of the water. You can see them there, but only if you practice noticing.

5 Positioning Strategies by Marc MacYoung

What does it look like when a person or group Positions for an Attack? Marc MacYoung came up with Five Positioning Strategies to watch for. These are the most common documented strategies criminals use to get close to you.

Closing

The first strategy, called Closing, as in closing distance, is virtually identical to the Regular Interview we discussed in the previous installment of the Self Defense Continuum. Again, you can see how closely related the Interview and Positioning stages can be. In Closing, as in the Regular Interview, a potential criminal approaches you in need of something like a light or directions.

Obviously, not everyone asking for directions is after you, but at the moment you feel your intuition whispering in your ear and a stranger happens to be either close or getting there, you can at the very least, choose not to be distracted. Your natural alerts should of course be augmented if you are alone, in a Fringe Area, pregnant, in charge of young or disabled people, lost, it is dark or any one of the other environmental or situational arrangements that causes a measure of vulnerability.

We have ways of reading body language and intent. A person who really needs directions does not “feel” the same as a person who doesn’t but who is approaching you on that pretext. There are subtleties of eye movement, peripheral attention, expression and determination that can be read if we are aware of our own and other people’s cues. This is why it is so crucial to the practice of self defense that we learn to articulate our instincts and apprehensions.

Cornering or Trapping

The next Positioning Strategy is called Cornering or Trapping. The potential criminal approaches you from a direction that traps you between him and a large object, like a wall. This usually means he is blocking an exit as well. He has thought this out while you were shopping.

For obvious reasons you want to be especially savvy about this strategy, which requires general awareness of where you are and where any and all exits are. An accomplice might be waiting behind one of the doors. Know where all the exits are, not just one.

Surprise

The Surprise strategy is that ‘holy crap!’ moment of the movie where the guy appears in the back seat of the car or the closet. You don’t see him until it’s too late.

Notice covered and concealment. Avoid the hiding spots or keep your distance, especially when you are alone. Don’t walk too close to parked cars or doorways, walk down the middle of the sidewalk.

Pincer

The next positioning strategy is known as Pincer. We know that criminals sometimes work in teams or gangs and Pincer is an effective strategy when they do.

Pincer takes several forms:

Two or more people suddenly split up as they approach you. You may have see this when kids split up to harass or bully another kid. It is highly disconcerting to engage several people at once, one of whom is behind you.
One thug engages you from the front using the first positioning strategy we called Closing, and the other blindsides you or grabs your bag.
Two guys face each other across a narrow walkway so you have to walk in between them.

Surrounding

Finally there is Surrounding, which Marc tells us is most common with three or more thugs. You walk through or along a group of guys and suddenly you are in the middle. They may hang out in a sort of line, as in leaning against a wall, so the front guy can wait for you while the last follows behind as you pass. Sometimes they swarm quickly, but often they drift around you. They are hedging their bets in case they have chosen the wrong person. They may also be trying to look nonchalant, that is, not suspicious to anyone who might be watching.